Friday, October 30, 2009

Roller Coaster of Life 2 - At Mind's End

Night, has never seem so silent. Lying down on the bed, The Dark knight felt the emptyness surging around him. Rain, was spilling down from the dark sky, washing away everything around the Dark knight... Leaving behind the emptyness, and loneliness.. Staring away into the darkness, memories started flooding back into his mind. Every scene of life he faced recently, flashed across his eyes...

Slowly, the memories drifted back to the day when The Dark Knight turned his back to the princess... Though the scar is still there, the pain is long gone. Life after the break up is just back to normal. Everyday, both the Dark knight and the princess went to the same institute in search of knowledge. Seeing each other everyday, while knowing that both of us can't be together is a pain that the Dark knight bear everytime he sees her. Either way, life must go on. We can't always live is our own memories, while neglecting what's around us all the time. In the time being, the career is still the main priority. Graduating from the institute is what the Dark knight aim for the moment he entered the institute. And he will allow nothing to step between him and his goal.

But, human is still a human. Feelings is what makes us a human. Those living without any feelings, is better off become a corpse. No life at all. Even though we can't be couples, but the Dark knight hope that friendship can still exist between him and the princess. Sometimes, the Dark knight will find her to have a small chat, just a small chat between two good friends. While the dark knight and the princess are chatting, the Dark knight hoped that time can just pause a little longer, so that he can have a little more time to be with her. But in the heart of Dark knight, he knew that anything more than a friendship will bring him and the princess more harm than good. But soon, the Dark knight realised that even a small chat, can bring them a lot of harm. He was shocked, that someone is willing to do anything to stop him from contact with the princess. The Dark knight just couldn't understand, living in this modern era, what is the harm that two person talking with each other? Why should a life be so restricted? And the main things is, what has the Dark knight done, that made some party so dislike him? These are the questions that pondered the Dark knight until today.

All the time, the Dark knight is thinking what he has done that make "them" so unhappy. I'm not doing any crime, I'm not involving in any harmful activities, I am also a medical student, results is almost the same with the white knight, most important of all, I did not harm the princess. I just couldn't think of what reason that make that party so dislike me. Sometimes alone, I asked that guy above that everybody worshiped :"How am I supposed to do?", "Can somebody just tell me of my wrong doings?". But, no luck so far.

There are somethings I would like to say though. Like it or not, both of us are going to face each other for at least 5 years. You can't aspect we just walk away and think that nothing has happened. Doing things the ruthless way will not solve the problem. Sometimes we should stand in others prospective to look at the problem. Most important of all, the WHOLE thing is NO BIG DEAL. Relationship is just a small part of life. I wish that some party please do not magnify the problems. For now, studies is the most important thing for the Dark knight and the princess. The Dark knight do not hope that unpleasant things to occur, things that everyone will regret once it's done.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Life...

Life, is short.
But life can be long also.
By living your life happily.
I believe life is just the way I live it.
Usually, I do not believe in fate.

Why have I said this?
Fortune teller tell your destiny,
by looking at the readings from your palm.
He can say, what he saw in my future.
But, once i hold my hand into a fist,
I realize that fate can be controlled in my own hands.
It is within my own will and action,
that determine my life.
What I believe is, I can create my own life.
By doing the things I like,
By crafting my own career,
By sharing my life with the women I love.

Unfortunately,
I'm not living a life that I plan it will be.
I'm always doing things I like,
I'm crafting my own future,
But, I'm not sharing my life with the one I love.
Before that, what I thought is I can have the life I planned.
but not everything will go according to plans.
There are always obstacles to lag your goal.
Either way, I still believe if I passed this obstacles,
with preservation,
with dignity,
with hardship,
and with my will,
I can continue with the life I want.
Be the Knight, and save the princess.
Anyway, things just won't go the way we want.

Sometimes, I think
is it really fated that my life should not be going like this?
or is it the necessary obstacle I must pass to achieve my goal?
Now, I'm confused.
Should I succumb to pressure?
Or should I hold with my principle till the end?

Just now, when I filled my hands with water,
I realise that water still can flow out through the lines between the fingers.
All of a sudden, I know.
I know that I can control most part of my life,
but there are still things I cant control.
There are still things that can leak out from my plan.
I realise I'm not God.
I am just a human.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Roller Coaster of Life

Once upon a time, in a kingdom of far far away, there live 2 mighty knights. The white knight, and the dark knight. Both of them crafted their own destiny, with their own hands and legs. The white knight, is known to be noble, and humble in nature. In contrast, the dark knight is known for his ruthlessness, and coldness of heart. Both can be said as the contrast of each other. But, fate had casted them to share the same ambition, same path to seek for glory, and the same women to be loved.

In the month of June, both the white knight and the dark knight went to their destined place-The Land Of Hornbills to seek for their glory. The Dark knight reached the land first, watching the vast piece of land from the airship, he said "This will be the place for me to expand my ambition, the dream that i have dream for so long." After touching down from the airship, the Dark knight spent a night at the town, and headed to the barrack-Unimas the next day. The Dark knight. Passed through the recruitment post without problem, and settled down. Meanwhile, the white knight is arriving a day later, carrying with him the same hope and ambition. On the third day, the Dark knight and the white knight finally met each other. Since both of them carries the same dream, both immediately became friends. They also discovered that they came from the same town, and the same training ground, just different batches. On that day, the promised to fight along side of each other, and achieve their goals together.

On the first week, due to the aggressiveness of the Dark knight, he was chosen to represent the house to fight for glory in the Colosseum(MAP). In the mean time, there was a princess who was chosen too for this agenda. In order to secure the winning, all representatives must train together and work together. On one training, the Dark knight finished his part, and rest aside to watch the other. At that time, his eyes fell upon the princess, who cut through his heart with her mesmerizing dance.. Little that he knew that this will bring to his own fall later on. A fall that he will never ever recover from.

The first week went by, without taking any action. The 2nd week, fate had put them together again, this time in the same group. The Dark knight felt a sense of hope, "will she be the one that fills my heart? Is she the one that i will be destined to be with?". Either way, the Dark knight would like to focus on his goal, and to make sure she is the one, before he take any further action.
After the 2nd week, everybody entered into the fighting mode. All the task and challenge were given, to train them to be the person they want. At this time, the white knight also fell for the princess. The white knight always approach her, hoping to get her attention. While the Dark knight, always watch her from a far, hoping to be with her.

Finally, the Dark knight felt that the time has come. He will not wait any longer for the chance to slip away. So, he made his move. The Dark knight approached her secretly, hoping not to get any unwanted attention. The princess was shocked at first. But as time goes by, the Dark knight get along very well with the princess. He can talk, and share the joys of life with her like nothing he had experienced before. Finally, they fall for each other. Unfortunately, beautiful things wont last long, and almost all the time, it can just gone in a blink of eye.

The day after the Dark knight asked for the hand of the princess, the White knight also made his move. He made the announcement to everyone that he will officially ask for the favor of the princess. At that time, almost everyone wished good luck for the White knight. Meanwhile, the Dark knight felt a sudden rock fell onto his heart. "Why...Must fate be like this?"" he asked himself.

The princess faced a very hard decision. Everyone, especially the Queen and the King and the sister agreed to choose the white knight, as he seemed to be humble and polite. The Dark knight, knowing that everyone will treat him as the outsider, the wrecker of relationship he asked for the princess to hold on to the decision, let time show who shall she choose. Unfortunately, the Queen insisted that the princess to break the bond with the Dark knight. On one fine monday, the princess caved in, and asked for the break up with the Dark knight, at a secret rendezvous.

The Dark knight, from the moment he received the news, his world turned totally upside down. The One he had finally found, has made the decision to follow others blessing and go for the white knight. The break was an excruciating break. Both the Dark knight and the princess, knowing that both love each other, had to be separated. That day, was the darkest day for the Dark knight. The breaking of this bond had brought him pain, hurt and sorrow. The pain, is the pain that he had never felt before. It was like bleeding from the inside, with no help at all to stop the bleeding. That night, the princess also rejected the white knight.

Knowing this, the Dark knight felt hope was coming back. He asked again for the hands of the princess, and the princess agreed. Both the Dark knight and the princess lived a happy life for a few days. Just a short few days.

Soon, the news of the Dark knight and the princess reached the ears of the Queen. The queen was furious, and ordered the princess to end this immediately. Everyday, the Queen tormented her, but she refuse to do so. Finally, the steel claw of the Queen aimed for the Dark knight. On one night, where the rain was falling from the sky, the Queen ordered a meeting with the Dark knight. The Dark knight was hoping to convince the Queen to accept him. Little did he knew that, the Queen had already made the decision.

The meeting was held at a drink station, not far from the Dark knight's house. A carriage was prepared, and the Queen together with the King, came to meet the Dark knight. Straight to the point, the Queen asked the Dark knight to give up, and let the princess go. The Dark knight was shocked. He thought he was here to discuss, not to be ordered. So, the Dark Knight tried to ask for mercy from the Queen. What coming next was not expected from the Dark knight. Words, filled with thousands of knife were thrown at the Dark knight. Those words was like sharp knives, each penetrating deeper and deeper into his heart. The Dark knight was at the mercy of the Queen. There was nothing the Dark knight can do. All he can is just tied up, and crucified by the Queen. Upon achieving what she wanted, the Queen sent the battered Dark knight back home. At that moment, the heart of the Dark knight was shattered into hundreds of pieces, together with the love for the princess. Without the blessing from the Queen, the love between him and the princess is over.

The next day, the Dark knight meet with the princess, at the rendezvous they met last time. This time, the Dark knight did not feel much pain, as the heart already shattered. The pain turned into a numb. This break ended quite smoothly, and the decision is made. We both know that, we will not get the blessing from the others, and the road we faced together will be a hard, painful road. This break, can also be said as the freedom from pain. If we stayed together, the pain will be more deep.

Now, both the Dark knight and the princess faced each other everyday, while separated by the harshness of life. This will be a pain, that scarred both of our heart. In his heart of hearts, the Dark knight prayed that the princess will find her own happiness, where no restriction, and no boundaries was set...

...The End...